Anxiety, stress, overwhelmingly fast paced thoughts...
One obsession prevails everytime.
There is this obsessive image in my mind that calms me when I'm stressed or that there is turmoil in my head.
I imagine myself transpercing my head repetitively or simply blowing my head off. However, it's not that I want to die. It's just a fantacy of massaging my brain with vigor to release the tensions.
Thus, illustrating this fantacy might as well be calming to me. For this purpose, the ink of an octopus could represent the explosion of the head. Moreover, I had the idea to add eyes all over the octopus's arms.
Hence, I painted my head with the octopus shooting ink with eyes on it's arms. Consequently, I omitted depicting eyes on my face as they got sucked in by the explosion and multiplied all over the animal's limbs.
When I contemplated the finished work, I was struck by the fact that it illustrates perfectly the psychoanalytic work I perform with my therapist. For instance, the ink of the octopus represents all the illusions, dreams, hallucinations, repetitive negative experiences. Furthermore, the absence of eyes on my face shows that I am not looking outside of myself for responsability or to find meaning and solutions. In fact, the numerous eyes on the octopus arms illustrates the analysis of my own behaviors, dreams, hallucinations, etc. This analysis happens as many times necessary to unlock the reasons of the negative scenarios repeated in my life. At last, I can find the best solutions to make positive changes.
Let me know what this painting evokes for you in the comments!