Anxiety, stress, overwhelmingly fast paced thoughts...
One obsession prevails everytime.
I have this obsessive image in my mind that calms me when I'm stressed or that there is turmoil in my head.
I imagine that I transperce my head repetitively or that I simply explode it.It's not that I want to die.It's just a fantacy of messaging my brain with vigor to release the tensions.
I wanted to have an image of this because I wondered if seeing it would also calm me. I thought that the ink of an octopus could represent the explosion of the head. I also had a mental image of an octopus with eyes all over it's arms.
So, I made my head with the octopus shooting ink with eyes on it's arms. I omitted putting the eyes on my face as they got sucked in by the explosion multiplying all over the octopus.
When I looked at the finished painting, I was struck by the fact that it illustrates perfectly the psychoanalytic work I do on myself. The ink of the octopus represents all the illusions, dreams, hallucinations, repetitive negative experiences. The lack of eyes on my face shows that I am not looking outside of myself for responsability or to find meaning and solutions. The eyes on the octopus and the numerous arms illustrates the analysis of my own behaviors, dreams, hallucinations, etc., as many times necessary to unlock the reasons of the negative scenarios repeated in my life and find the best solutions to make positive changes.
Let me know what this painting evokes for you in the comments!